Dele Alli opens up about how he spent 6 weeks in rehab for an addiction to sleeping pills

The 27-year-old was one of the best youngsters before his career fell off

In a conversation with Gary Neville's podcast, The Overlap, Dele Alli disclosed his struggle with addiction while sharing devastating details about his upbringing.

The 27-year-old became a household name at Tottenham under Mauricio Pochettino, earning the PFA Young Player of the Year title for his efforts in the 2015–16 season and earning a berth in Gareth Southgate's England squad for the 2018 World Cup.

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However, Alli eventually lost popularity at Tottenham due to his struggles with recurrent injuries, and in January 2022 he signed a transfer agreement with Everton before being loaned out to the Turkish team Besiktas.

The strategy didn't work out as planned, and Alli has since disclosed that he spent six weeks in treatment this summer after developing a sleeping medication addiction.

The primary thoughts from Alli's interview are outlined here.

'So, when I came back from Turkey, I came in and I found out that I need an operation and I was in a bad place mentally and yeah, I decided to go to like a modern-day rehab facility for mental health. They deal with like addiction, mental health, and trauma because it was something that I felt like it was time for.

'I think with things like that, you can't be told to go there, I think you have to know, and you have to make the decision yourself, otherwise, it's not going to work and yeah, to be honest, I was caught in a bad cycle – you know.

I was relying on things that were doing me harm and yeah, I think I was waking up every day and I was winning the fight, you know, going into training, smiling, showing that I was happy.

But inside, I was definitely losing the battle and it was time for me to change it because when I got injured and they told me I needed surgery, I could feel the feelings I had when the cycle begins and I didn't want it to happen anymore.

'So I went there, I went there for six weeks and Everton were amazing about it, you know. They supported me 100% and I'll be grateful to them forever.

I think, whatever happens in the future, for them to be so open and honest and understanding, I think I couldn't have asked for anything more in that time when I was probably making the biggest decision of my life – something I was scared to do. But I'm happy I've done it and to be honest, I couldn't of expected it to go the way it did.'

Alli said he wanted time to open up about his trauma

'So, I got out [of rehab] three weeks ago, I think, and if I'm being honest, I probably wouldn't have wanted to talk about it this soon. I think maybe give it a bit more time, but I am feeling in a really good place, and I feel strong enough to do this – I think that's important.

'I maybe could have done with a little bit more time, in terms of when I was talking about it, but unfortunately the way the world is now – you know the tabloids – they found out and were calling my team a lot and telling, you know, that they knew where I was and stuff. And the decision that I maybe made in the past where I didn't really care about what people thought, and I didn't care about being understood, I would have just let them write what they wanted to write, and you know, put their own story out which they do a lot of the time.

'But it's not the reality, and also, you know, I want to help other people to know that they're not alone in the feelings they've got and that you can talk to people, it doesn't make you weak to get help, to be vulnerable. There's a lot of strength in that. So, to come out and to share my story, I'm happy to do it.'

Alli claims he had to take sleeping pills to deal with his trauma

'I mean [my troubles have] been going on for a long time, I think, without me realising it – the things I was doing to numb the feelings I had. I mean I didn't realise I was doing it for that purpose, whether it be drinking or whatever. The things a lot of people do – but if you abuse it and use it in the wrong way, and you're not actually doing it for the pleasure, you're doing it to try and chase something or hide from something, it can obviously damage you a lot.

'So, it started with that and then I got addicted to sleeping tablets, and it's probably a problem that you know, not only I have, I think it's something that's going around more than people realise in football. You know, maybe, hopefully me coming out and speaking about it can help people because don't get me wrong, they work, I think.

'With our schedule, you have a game, you have to be up early in the morning to train, you've got all the adrenaline and stuff so sometimes, you know, to take a sleeping tablet and be ready for the next day is fine, but when you're broken as I am, it can obviously have the reverse effect because it does work for the problems you want to deal with.

'That is the problem – it works until it doesn't. So yeah, I definitely abused them too much, and don't get me wrong, I'd stop sometimes and go a few months without them, but I was never really dealing with the problem you know, it got really bad at some points and I didn't understand how bad it was, but I was never dealing with the route of the problem, which was when I was growing up and the traumas I had, the feelings I was holding onto and I tried to deal with it all by myself. I didn't want to tell anyone.'

Alli says he had to hide his sleeping pills from his family

'There were a number of times my adopted family and my brother – you know, it makes me sad – they would take me to rooms crying, asking me to just speak to them, tell them what I'm thinking, how I'm feeling, and I just couldn't do it because I wanted to deal with it by myself.

'I didn't feel like opening up to anyone, I had a lot of people try help me, because they could see it in me. I wasn't who I was, I lost myself for a few years, and you know, I was just turning everyone away, not accepting any help from anyone. I mean when I have the family that saved my life crying, asking me to tell them what's wrong, I just didn't want to do it.

'They had heard a few times about them [the sleeping tablets], but I'd swear on everything that I'd never taken them, which is part of the problem you know, I didn't want help. I'd tell myself that I wasn't an addict, I wasn't addicted to them, but I definitely was.'

Alli asserts trajectory of his football career affected him badly

'Don't get me wrong, I love football, it saved my life, I owe everything to football – but it's not just as easy as everyone thinks it is. It's not this high life. Yes, you have money, you can do a lot of things that you wouldn't be able to do without it, but mentally, I don't think people will ever understand until you're in it, what it can do to you.

'Rejection, just being told you're not good enough, fighting every day. Even something like losing a game, it can affect you mentally, and you have to be ready, you have to be smiling the next day. When you're not, it's a problem.'

Alli reveals he was molested by his mom's friend at age of six

'[My childhood is] something I haven't really spoken about that much, to be honest. I mean, I think there were a few incidents that could give you kind of a brief understanding. So, at six, I was molested by my mum's friend, who was at the house a lot. My mum was an alcoholic, and that happened at six. I was sent to Africa to learn discipline, and then I was sent back. At seven, I started smoking, eight I started dealing drugs. An older person told me that they wouldn't stop a kid on a bike, so I rode around with my football, and then underneath I'd have the drugs, that was eight. Eleven, I was hung off a bridge by a guy from the next estate, a man.

'Twelve, I was adopted – and from then, it was like – I was adopted by an amazing family like I said, I couldn't have asked for better people to do what they'd done for me. If God created people, it was them. They were amazing, and they've helped me a lot, and that was another thing, you know – when I started living with them, it was hard for me to really open up to them, because I felt within myself, it was easy to get rid of me again. I tried to be the best kid I could be for them. I stayed with them from 12, and then started playing first-team, professionally, at 16. It all sort of took off from there.' Dele Alli Exclusive: I learnt a lot about my mum whilst I was in rehab

Alli says he was betrayed by his biological parents

'My dad went missing for a while, and he might come out now and say some stuff about me, but when I started playing for England, he came back and then I used to speak to my mum as well. Just to try and help her.

'I don't speak to my mum anymore. So, when I was 18, my biological mum and dad went to the newspaper and like, started accusing the family that adopted me of doing all this stuff when they didn't know what they had, like they were the ones that used to make me go and see my mum. I never wanted to go. They would always tell me, 'She's your mum, like you should have a relationship with her'. And I think that spoke volumes, like what they were doing. They were just doing it generally because they're amazing people. So yeah.

'And then my mum – my blood mum and dad – went to the press saying that these people are taking advantage of me. They want to go through my contracts. And I hadn't spoken to him for years. And I knew that wasn't my mum's decision because I know she didn't really leave Milton Keynes. Like there was no way she'd done that. So, yeah, after that I just felt so betrayed and let down. And hurt that I just couldn't keep the relationship with my mum. And my dad, I don't want a relationship with him either.'

Alli thought of retiring from football at the age of 24

'It's hard to pinpoint one exact moment [when I started to feel that things weren't right]. Probably the saddest moment for me, was when [José] Mourinho was manager, I think I was 24. I remember there was one session, like one morning I woke up and I had to go to training – this is when he'd stopped playing me – and I was in a bad place.

'I remember just looking in the mirror – I mean it sounds dramatic but I was literally staring in the mirror – and I was asking if I could retire now, at 24, doing the thing I love. For me, that was heart-breaking to even have had that thought at 24, to want to retire. That hurt me a lot, that was another thing that I had to carry.'

Alli feels he wants to revive his football career once again

'What I went through, you know, helped me really understand my purpose. Like, when I'm just going through everything, breaking it down and finding out why I'm here, what I want in life, you know?

'I know what I can do on the pitch. I mean, I think I've showed people what I can do on the pitch and now I've got the feeling back. Like, before I went to Tottenham, when I had a lot to prove, and I wanted to fight and I felt so much love and passion about football. I have that back, which for me is something I've missed for probably longer than I wanted to. But with the other side of it, I want to inspire people not only on the pitch, but off the pitch in a way that I think is probably not spoken about enough, from experience.'

Dele Alli Exclusive: Mauricio Pochettino was perfect for me – he guided me and was so understanding of me as a person 'Mauricio Pochettino was the best manager and I couldn't have asked for a better manager at the time. I was in him and his team, you know, not just him. There was Jesus [Perez], Miguel [d'Agostino] and Tony [Jimenez]. They are amazing people and they're so understanding, and it wasn't like a footballer and a manager relationship. It was deeper than that, I felt. He was just so understanding of the decisions I was making, and he was guiding – like, he cared about me as a person before the football, which is what I needed at that time. And I think that's important for young players.

'When you go somewhere it can be quite scary, I think. And I never had that fear of, you know, trying to prove myself in that sense, because I felt like he was giving me the platform to express myself the best I could and to be comfortable. I mean, players always used to say, 'I want to be like that' [fearless]. I wasn't fearless. I was just brave. But I think being brave, you feel the fear still, but you still do it. And I think that's something that he allowed me to do.

Dele speaks about he is now in a better place.

'Yeah, I think [I'm ok], that's a question I've definitely been asked a lot – but I think this is probably the first time in a long time that I can say 'yeah' and like mean it. I think mentally I'm probably in the best place I've ever been, and I feel good. Obviously injured at the minute, but I've got that passion back for football – I'm doing really well.

'Yeah, I think now is probably the right time for me to tell people what's been going on. It's tough to talk about because it's quite recent and it's something I've kind of hid for a long time – and I'm scared to talk about it, but I think it's the right thing to do.'